Fabulous Miss S.

Live-Blogging a Random Monday

I've decided to live-blog the day, or at least, as much as time permits...

6:55am ... shit. i need to get up. i also need to pee. if i get up now, i will be early! i will be on time! all week! my life will be perfect! Upon attempting to open my eyes, I saw Marc scurry into the bathroom ... and quickly decide to close eyes and sleep some more as bathroom is not currently available.

7:17am ... get out of bed. curse alarm clock for "not working" and by "not working" I mean ... failing to shake my fat ass out of bed at precisely 6:30am ... and causeing me to be late for everything.

7:20am ... shower.

7:30am ... grumble at marc and cats

8:15am ... walk out the door for work and curse self for once again not being able to get out the damn door by 8am to be at work ON TIME GODDAMMIT.

8:45am ... Am privy to my receptionists tales of woe as is related to her unstable gut as she "ate seafood last night" and "everything is loose, but not ready to move" ... perhaps the breakfast of microwavable bacon and ovecooked onions will assist in the much needed "movement".

8:45:31am ... note to self: get key to use ladies bathroom on anything floor BUT the 5th, all day.

9:06am ... decided that my life, as it stands in this moment, is worthy of a live blog.

9:20am ... check Outlook calendar for editing deadlines today and tomorrow and realize I haven't actually started what is needed.  Wonder aloud if I am actually the dependable! reliable! fabulous!! assistant I advertise to be.

9:23am ... make notes on large colorful index cards when random ideas float into my head ... laundry, clean bathroom, send thank-you note for the espresso maker, find recipe for avocado cream sauce,  ...

9:55am ... move papers from left side of keyboard to right and feel as though I have accomplished something.

10:30am ... decided to find wedding gown stores in NYC that I can visit when I go see my Connecticut friends next month. Found the mecca of bridal gowns, www.kleinfeldbridal.com  -- Noticed that they DO NOT carry any of the brands of dresses I have tried on thus far.  Peak at the Carolina Herrera gowns and drool .... imagine just TRYING ON a Carolina Herrera gown ...

10:32am ... wake up from day dream and remember that I just bought a HOUSE and CANNOT wear a wedding dress that rivals three months of mortgage payments.

10:33am ... feel sad because I will never find the right dress for my too-big-boobed and not skinny enough body, what with my muscular legs and round strong arms from years of swimming laps and laps and laps and my ass which is just a whole zip code by itself goddammit. URGH!

10:34am ... curse myself for having hormones which make me curse my body and then curse my body for not being a perfet size 4 like my 59 year old mother!

10:35am ... goddammit.

10:36am ... decided that THIS was NOT the time to decide on my wedding dress and perhaps should consider doing some goddamned work.

11:17am ... my eyelids are getting heavy ... I am feeling veerrrry sleepy!

12:55pm ... use fifth floor women's bathroom with great hesitance due to receptionists tales of gastric woe.

1:01pm ... remember that i brought a salad for lunch and wish that I wasn't trying to be healthy and could eat a big juicy italian sub, or a a whole plate of macaroni and cheese ... but OH!   Find crutons I left in file cabinet drawer last week ... still have crunch  ... add to salad. 

1:24pm ... Applaud self for eating salad and being healthy.  Decide to work thru lunch to make up for time spent live-blogging this morning.

1:25pm ... ponder calling bridal shops in search of Destinations 16113 and Alfred Angelo 1428 but realize lack of emotional energies hinder such calls

3:09pm ... still editing a proposal

3:10pm ... should i have baked chicken with cauliflower in avocado cream sauce tonight? or broiled perch ?

3:54pm ... Answering an IRS letter

3:55pm ... Return to editing. My shoulder hurts. I wonder if I lifted something heavy without realizing it. Humm....

5:44pm ... Wishing to go home, but since Marc is out for awhile, perhaps I should use this time to get some things done at work ... or some things done at home, like, laundry, and cleaning and wedding planning and thank-you note writing and couch sitting and bath-taking and cat-petting ...

5:45pm ... ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Coming to you LIVE and HOT. The END.

Live-Blogging a Day ....

6:35am    alarm goes off...Roll over, turn it off, and sleep more.

6:45am    alarm goes off again. hit it, turn over and sleep more.

6:46am    other alarm goes off. throw clock on the floor, scare cat who runs across your body and wakes you more than should be before 7am.

7:04am    drag self from bed to shower

7:05am    shower

7:11am    Marc starts talking to me and I remember nothing of what he said because, I am quite certain I was still sleeping, just vertical and wet at this point.

7:15am    Pull on underwear and bra and stand in closet for 10 minutes wondering what to wear, cause, I have nothing to wear dammit!

7:48am    curse time for moving faster than myself. eat bowl of cereal, notice that Fried Green Tomatoes is on TV and proceed to watch it while eating cereal.

7:51am    change out of white pinstripe Dockers and pink shirt because pants are too long and I must have shrunk since I bought them this weeked, goddammit! Pull on freshly ironed Ann Taylor Loft khaki-ish pants.

7:54am    with still wet hair change out of Loft-khaki pants as they fold into the fat rolls of my stomach far too obiviously and proclaim loudly to cats who do not understand or care, "I have NO-thing to wear and I hate all my clothes."

8:01am    Already one minute late, I find a purple shirt that will look dainty and girlie with my pink knit sleeveless top and since it is going to be 101 degrees today, my office should just thank GOD that I actually put clothes on at all.

8:02am    Dry hair.

8:03am    Curse hair for not drying.

8:04am    Chalk up non-drying hair to excessive humidity and huff out of bathroom

8:05am    Back to bathroom to pee and brush teeth.

8:08am    Turn off lights and televisions.

8:09am    Stand in the middle of the living room long enough to ponder outwardly what exactly besides my body and purse should I take to work today.  Decide that today is perfect day to make millions of calls to venues and ask if they hold weddings that normal people can afford.  Find wedding binder and notes and re-pack work bag to accomodate overly large wedding binder which has basically nothing of use inside of it as we don't even have a fucking date or definitive geographic location.

8:12am    Am late. Needed to leave at 8:00am. Curse self for not being able to get ready in one hour flat, having fat rolls that don't look good in khaki pants, and for not having dry-able hair.

8:13am    Proceed out of apartment wishing I could curl up on sofa and nap the morning away.  Experience daily minor anxiety that I forgot something that can't wait until I am back home in nine hours.

8:40am    Arrive at work, consistently ten minutes late. More cursing of self. Realize that others are later than me and relax, a bit.

9:25am    Decide that my morning activity is somehow in some stratosphere of the world, blog-worthy.

10:11am   Need to pee. Open desk drawer to get keys to bathroom... shouted over cubicle..."restroom Stacy" ... and I realize the receptionist has once again beat me to the bathroom and I must wait another two and a half minutes to pee. Shit. I have to stay, as I am on phone duty when she steps away. And, I get a kick out of letting her think she has power over me to tell me what to do.  It's fun. Really. It tickles me.

10:13:30   Receptionist back. Take keys and a one dollar bill to get soda from machine in basement.  Pee. Take steps down five flights of stairs in effort to get myself in shape.

10:15am    Praise self for ability to walk DOWN five flights of steps totally unwinded and consider walking up all five flights on return trip.

10:16am   Walk to basement level. Realize that stairwell exits directly to outside on 1st Floor.  Am stuck in stairwell. Walk up one level. Level 2 reads DO NOT OPEN, ALARM ACTIVATED. I proceed to third floor (have now walked up three flights of steps and do not wish to see any more steps for many hours).  Exit stairwell to nowhere on third floor and get in elevator to go back to basement. Make mental note to curse self for being idiot and getting stuck in stairs and for getting tired at walking up three flights.

10:18:20am Attempt with NO success to put dollar bill into machine. take my damn money you goddamed machine and give me a cold soda NOW goddammit.

10:19am    Still attempting to cramp dollar bill into soda machine. I don't learn easily folks!

10:20am    Give up. Retreat upstairs. Via elevator.

10:31am    Sit at desk sulking without caffeinated soda and think about which project to work on now. Also decide to tell Internet how stupid I can be.  Attmept to humor the world with my own ability to laugh at myself.

11:02am    Confirm 12:30 lunch with coworker and start sweating at the thought of being outside for more than five seconds

11:04am    Praise self for being busy with multiple projects, taking clear phone messages and not being so tired I could fall over. Yet.

12:30pm     Left for lunch with co-worker M. Walked three blocks to Austin Grill. Restuarant smelled like lysol, but only in the door-way, so I decided to stay on track and eat there. Co-worker had coupon for free entree, so we had an $18 lunch for $7.67. Since it is soon to be coworker M's b-day (hence the coupon), I paid a whole $12 -- the server was good and I felt bad, so I left a very generous tip. 

1:40pm      Late to get back to work. Are you noticing a pattern yet? late...late...late

1:45pm      Sit down at desk and sigh audibly as sweat drips from all areas of skin, exposed and not exposed.

2:00pm      Decide NOT to curse self for lateness returning from lunch as I was with coworker who was having a pre-birthday lunch.

2:01pm      Login to hotmail

2:02pm      Login to Gmail

2:03pm      Check office email

2:04pm      Brush and floss teeth in bathroom. Praise self for excellent oral hygiene.

2:07pm      Update spreadsheet for boss, take phone message, return calls and surf internet intermittenly. Also at random intervals worked on creating address labels for phantom guests at my phantom wedding. (the event will lose the title of phantom when it actually gets assigned a damn date) Also created spreadsheet for potential venues to help the phantomness go by the wayside. Oh! Planet Wayside -- that little shack of a restuarant that I never went to but heard was really good in Hamilton. NAH!

2:50pm      Shook self awake from day-dreaming while staring at my ring....

3:00pm      Bathroom-break?

4:54pm      Receptionist leaves for the day

5:01pm     Made a copy

5:01:30    Made a copy

5:02pm     Made a copy

5:02:30    Made a copy

5:03pm    Made a copy

5:03:30    Made a copy

5:04pm     Made a copy

5:15pm     Stuffing envelopes with checks and got compliment on my ring. *Glowing, love my ring, love that other people love my ring* lalalallaaaa, laalaaaa lala....

5:35pm     Think about going home. Think I might wait until boss leaves.

5:51pm     Still here. Gave advice to co-worker R. Yapped about various nothings.

5:52pm     Caught up on my Day in the Life LIVE Blogging... thinking about going home. More serious this time. 

6:52pm     Finally left work. But, stayed late to talk with co-worker L.  Had good talk. Enjoyed learning about a new friend.  Did some work. Stayed later than the boss. So, all is good.

7:15pm      Home. Saw Marc. Happy.

7:25pm      Had first glass of wine on balcony and talked with Marc. Serious talk ... until I said the word 'happiness' ... when my severely IMMATURE finace started laughing uncontrollably.  After much, MUCH, prodding, he told me he was thinking about what it would be if you removed the HAP from the work HAPPINESS ... yeah, PINESS. As in, penis.  Yes! I know ... I already agreed to marry this kid ! 

8:30pm      Lost time, had second glass of wine ... talked with Marc.

9:00pm     (parents, avert your eyes, sexual innuendo ahead) Showered with Marc as we were in the midst of a conversation and ... it was fun.  I mean, what else is there to do, laundry?  And, laundry is NOT fun.

10:27pm    Ending today's liveblogging session. Am watching FRIENDS... reruns on some cable channel.  Have not had dinner. Feel damn good. Took allergy meds this morning and for the first time in two weeks, do not have a headache.  Also possibly hormones are good!  And! Tomorrow is FRIDAY, then the weekend. Yeah!

10:29pm    Must be tired as my typing is slowing down.

Goodnight Internet. Goodnight Moon. Goodnight FRIENDS.

okay, so a little alcohol is involved here. really, just wine, 2 glasses.

A day in the life of this working girl

Well, my working-girl career has gotten off to a wet but decent start.

I like my boss. I like my coworkers. I love my cubicle. I have the biggest cube in the whole office!  Shhhh! Don't tell anyone, cause I hate to brag.  I have a table and chairs inside of my cube!

I work for a man who tells me to go home at 5:45 because I've stayed too long. gaaahhhhhh.

A woman's work is never done.  I knew this before but somehow, this time around in the "real world" I feel wiser, I am a bit older, but I have definitely had a roller-coaster of experience with which to move forth and prosper.  It wasn't until today that I realized just how much I'd grown and just how much I'd learned.

I am just not sitting down, at 9:33pm to write an entry.  I have fed three cats. I played with each cat. I gave Gary/Murray extra attention 'cause he is new to the family.  I am waiting for Ms. Snake to finish her mouse.  She finally ate!  Thank GOD.  I am totally cool with holding her now, but watching her eat is just... blech... it makes me shiver.  Although, from the nature standpoint, it is truly fascinating.

Marc has a fever and is getting a cold. I took his temperature, brought him orange juice and Tylenol, then sat with him. 

It's 9:35 and I just want a few minutes to myself to chill out and absorb my day.  No one is on IM tonight, I guess the seven hundred inches of rain we got in the last 28 hours somehow caused them to melt away from the world of Instant Messenger.

I have to go put Ms. Snake back in her tank and email FABbrother the good news.